Bess—“Why did you let him kiss you?”
Tess—“He threatened to scream if I didn’t.”
* * *
All in the Name
A party of Louisville ladies, en route to a Canadian summer resort, was delayed on the border by the usual customs examination. To the question as to what her suitcase contained, the fairest and youngest replied:
“Nothing but wearing apparel.”
Now, tucked carefully away in one of the corners of that suitcase the efficient official brought to light a tiny vial (evidence of a thoughtful mother’s “safety first” measure) filled to the neck with nothing less than a generous swallow of the once justly famed “Kentucky Dew.”
The officer frowned to conceal his amusement. “Didn’t I understand you to say that this valise contained only wearing apparel?” he asked.
The fair Kentuckian nodded an affirmative, no whit abashed by the contradictory nature of the official’s find. “Well, will you tell me what you call this?” persisted the inquisitor, holding to view the diminutive bottle, whose very contents seemed blushing for its owner’s disregard for the truth.