A REMARKABLE case of table-talking lately took place. A cabinet-maker was recommending a table to a lady as a very fine new mahogany table. At which the table lifted itself up and exclaimed, "Don't you believe him, ma'am; I'm veneered and second-hand."
"'ARTHUR'S HOME GAZETTE' FOR 1854.—We cheerfully recommend this weekly to the public readers. Its past conduct proved it to be one of the highest excellence, and we have good reasons to believe that it will be so for the future. During the coming year 1854, Mr. Arthur, the editor, will publish two original nouvellettes in the columns of the 'Gazette,' one of which is entitled 'The Angel of the Household.'"—Flo. Democrat, Pensacola, Flo.
GARRETT & Co., of New York, have sent us "Mrs. Partington's Carpet-bag of Fun." A funny book, from which we make the following extracts:—
MODERN SCIENCE.—"Do you think people are troubled as much with flea-bottomary now, doctor, as they used to be before they discovered the anti-bug bedstead?" asked Mrs. Partington of a doctor of the old school, who attended the family where she was staying. "Phlebotomy, madam," said the doctor, gravely, "is a remedy, not a disease." "Well, well," replied she; "no wonder one gets 'em mixed up, there is so many of 'em; we never heard in old times of trousers in the throat, or embargoes in the head, or neurology all over us, or consternation in the bowels, as we do nowadays. But it's an ill wind that don't blow nobody good, and the doctors flourish on it like a green baize-tree. But of course they don't have anything to do with it—they can't make 'em come or go."
MRS. PARTINGTON AT SEA.—"There's poor Hardy Lee called again!" says Mrs. Partington on a trip to Boston. The wind was ahead, and the vessel had to beat up, and the order to put the helm "hard a lee" had been heard through the night. "Hardy Lee again! I declare; I should think the poor creetur would be completely exaspirated with fatigue; and I'm certain he hasn't eat a blessed mouthful of anything all the while. Captain, do call the poor creetur down, or human natur can't stand it."
SOUND LOGIC.—Mrs. Partington, on reading an account of a schooner having her jib-boom carried away in Long Island Sound, one night last week, wondered "why people would leave such things out o' doors, nights, to be stolen, when they was so many buglers about, filtering everything they could lay their hands to."