MOTHER: “Ethel, you naughty child, what have you been doing to make Charlie cry so?”
ETHEL: “I’ve only been sharing my cod-liver oil with him, mamma. You said it was so nice.”
It Was Worse Than Bigotry
A prisoner was brought before a police magistrate. He looked around and discovered that his clerk was absent. “Here, officer,” he said, “what’s this man charged with?”
“Bigotry, your Honor,” replied the policeman. “He’s got three wives.”
The magistrate looked at the officer as though astounded at such ignorance. “Why, officer,” he said, “that’s not bigotry—that’s trigonometry.”
A Devotional Turn of Mind
As the new minister of the village was on his way to evening service he met a rising young man of the place whom he was anxious to have become an active member of the church.
“Good-evening, my young friend,” he said solemnly; “do you ever attend a place of worship?”
“Yes, indeed, sir; regularly, every Sunday night,” replied the young fellow with a smile. “I’m on my way to see her now.”