Easy Enough
Some visitors who were being shown over a pauper lunatic asylum, says “Harper’s Weekly,” inquired of their guide what method was employed to discover when the inmates were sufficiently recovered to leave.
“Well,” replied he, “you see, it’s this way. We have a big trough of water, and we turns on the tap. We leave it running, and tells ’em to bail out the water with pails until they’ve emptied the trough.”
“How does that prove it?” asked one of the visitors.
“Well,” said the guide, “them as ain’t idiots turns off the tap.”
He Had Left the Cards All Right
The high-born dame was breaking in a new footman—stupid but honest.
In her brougham, about to make a round of visits, she found she had forgotten her bits of pasteboard. So she sent the man back with orders to bring some of her cards that were on the mantelpiece in her boudoir, and put them in his pocket.
At different houses, she told the footman to hand in one, and sometimes a couple, until at last she told Jeames to leave three at one house.
“Can’t do it, mum.”