BOUGHT HIS OWN FURNITURE.
An amusing story is told of a gentleman living in London. As the anecdote goes, it seems that he had a passion for the purchase of second-hand furniture at auctions, and that in making "good bargains" he had filled his house with antiquated and almost useless articles. Upon one occasion his wife took the responsibility, without consulting her husband, to have a portion of the least useful of the pieces removed to an auction-room to be sold. Great was her dismay when, on the evening of the day of the sale, the majority of the articles came back to the house. The husband had stumbled into the auction-room, and, not knowing his own furniture, had purchased it at a better bargain than at first.
INDIA-RUBBER BAIT.
According to a Troy fisherman, the latest triumph of Yankee inventive genius is an India-rubber fish-worm. It is said to be a remarkably good imitation of the common earthworm, is indestructible, and in actual use proves as alluring to the fishes as the genuine article. The old fisherman will be quick to see its advantages. One can equip himself for a day's sport without digging over a whole garden in his search for bait. A handful of India-rubber worms will last him a whole season, and there will be no necessity for pulling up the line every few minutes to see if the small-fry nibblers have left the hook bare. It is possibly hardly necessary to add here that the fisherman who tells of this invention may be like other fishermen, in which case the reader need not believe the story unless he wants to.
QUICK WIT.
A comedian in a French theatre once made a great hit out of a painful accident. One day, while indulging in a bit of horse-play on the stage, he hit his head violently, entirely an accident, against one of the pillars of the scene on the stage. On hearing the thud everybody uttered a cry. "No great harm done," said the comedian, "Just hand me a napkin, a glass of water, and a salt-cellar." These were brought, and he sat down, folded the napkin in the form of a bandage, dipped it in the glass, and emptied the salt-cellar on the wet part. Having thus prepared a compress according to prescription, and when every one expected he would apply it to his forehead, he gravely rose and tied it round the pillar. The effect of his action was such that every one set him down as the readiest and wittiest man in his profession.