Joker. Peradventure it may seem improper for a fool to leave his lowly place and climb upon the throne. But no one's here to say me nay; and by my faith fools have sat on thrones before. What odds, then, if there's one fool more or one fool less beneath the dais? To be sure, my crown's a fool's cap and my sceptre's a rattle, and so, perhaps, not imposing; but it pleases me to sit here and fancy myself a King. Nay, laugh not. It's the province of a fool to be foolish. And verily am I not a king? Am I not monarch of all I survey? In truth I am, for I survey nothing, and am therefore King of Nothing. There's a title for you—his Majesty the King of Nothing! (Yawns and stretches and rises from the throne; picks up his stool, places it near the front, and sits down.) In faith the throne's no softer than the stool, and perhaps it is best for me to cling to this. It affords at least one advantage over the King. If he falls—and I fall—he gets the greater injury, for he tumbles from a higher place. (Laughs softly, and then sings:)
"For it's nonny, hey nonny, the Jester's song,
It's nonny, hey nonny, hey oh!
For it's nonny, hey nonny, no life is long;
Oh, merry be ye here below!"
[As he sings the last line there is a loud noise of exploding fire-crackers behind the scenes, and the four Knaves come tumbling in at the door L. in great confusion, all talking at once. The Knave of Hearts holds a lighted taper in his hand, and the other Knaves carry fire-crackers and other fireworks under their arms.]
Knave of Spades. Thou didst it.
Knave of Hearts. Thou speakest false. 'Twas he.
"HEARTS DID IT!"
Knave of Diamonds. Never. Hearts did it.
Knave of Clubs. Hearts held the taper. He did it. Thou didst it.
Knave of Spades. Ay, ay, 'twas he.