Father. "Now, Tom, you should know how to defend yourself. You see, this is the first position, and so. Now don't be afraid; strike out with the gloves."
Father (fifteen minutes later). "Confound it, how was I to know he had been taking lessons at the school gymnasium."
PHILOSOPHY.
WALTER G. NICHOLS.
A puppy who had chased his tail
Around the livelong day
Quite unsuccessfully, was heard
Unto his tail to say:
"I s'pose you think this quite a joke
To lead me such a chase,
And make me show my master now
A disappointed face.
"But though this is for you more fun
Than me, just wait a few
More years, and then I'll be as good
At 'wagging' as are you!"
A TIMELY QUESTION.
Horace. "Father, why do they 'prefer charges' against policemen for acting improperly? Why don't they make 'em pay cash?"