"Everything, father, except a new set of teeth, and I may be able to get through the year without losing those that I have," replied the Freshman.
Jack got asking his grandmother questions the other night. One of them was:
"Grandma, if you was a centipede, would you always insist on putting on fifty pairs of rubbers before you walked on the grass?"
Up to this hour the dear old lady has not made up her mind on the important point.
Li Hung-Chang, the famous Chinaman who visited this country a short time ago, made quite an impression in England for his wit and apparent ingenuousness, although it was more than suspected that some of the old gentleman's remarks were not so bland as they seemed. One incident especially amused the Britishers. It was when Li Hung-Chang met Joseph Chamberlain, who affects a monocle. The Chinaman noticed the single eye-glass, and took it for granted that the Colonial Secretary had lost the use of one eye, and he offered him his sincere condolences.
PHILOSOPHIC.
To prophesy the future would
Bring more of evil than of good;
So let us thank our lucky stars
That no such gift our wisdom mars.