CERTITUDE.
When I hang up the racket,
The paddle, and bat,
When my red Tam o' Shanter
Supplants my straw hat;
When the cranberry's ripe and
The turkey is fat,
Thanksgiving is coming,
I'm certain of that!
Walter. "Papa, how do you pronounce W-o-r-c-e-s-t-e-r?"
Papa. "Wooster."
Walter. "Well, if Worcester is pronounced Wooster, why isn't Rochester pronounced Rooster?"
NOT PLEASANT.
I'm glad I'm not a Hollander;
I shouldn't like it much
To have to learn when I would speak
To say it all in Dutch.