"Pressing business, my pet!" you serenely reply.
When you've really been out on the "Tiddle-y-hi!" Yes, you have!
Male audience (as before). No, we've not!
The Sister S. (with the air of accusing angels). Why, you know you have!
Mrs. Toov. (to herself). It's to those young women's credit that they have the courage to come here and denounce the men to their faces—like this. And it's gone home to them, too! they're shouting out "Over!" (Here the Sisters suddenly turn a couple of "cart-wheels" with surprising unanimity, amidst roars of applause.) Oh, the shameless minxes! I will not sit and look on at such scandalous exhibitions. (She moves to the corner nearest the stage, and turns her back upon the proceedings.) How much longer will Pa compel me to assist at such scenes, I wonder? Why doesn't he come? Where is he now? (Bitterly.) No doubt on what those vulgar wretches would call the "Tiddle-y-hi!" (The Brothers Bimbo, Eccentric Clowns, appear on the stage.) I can't sit here in a corner looking at nothing. If I do see anything improper, Theophilus shall answer for it. (She changes her place again.) Acrobats—well, they're inoffensive at least. Oh, I do believe one of the nasty things is climbing up to the balcony; he's going to walk along here!
First Brother Bimbo (on stage, to his confrère, who is balancing himself on the broad ledge of the box tier). Ohè—'old up, there. Prenny garde! Ah, il tombera! There, I told yer so! (The Second Brother B. has reached the front of Mrs. Toovey's box, where he pretends to stumble.) Oh, le pover garçong, look at 'im now! Come back, do! Ask the lady to ketch 'old of your trousers be'ind!
Mrs. Toov. (to the Second Brother, firmly). Don't expect me to do anything of the sort. Go back, as your brother asks you to, you silly fellow. You shouldn't attempt such a foolhardy thing at all!
Second Br. B. (to the First). Oh, my! There's such a nice young lady in here; she's asking me to come in and set along with her! May I?
[He lets himself drop astride the ledge, and wags his head at Mrs. Toovey, to her intense horror.
Mrs. Toov. (in an audible undertone). If you don't take away that leg at once, I'll pinch it!