Markiss, not to be outdone, denounced Mr. G. as "a despot," and his colleagues in the Government "a well-trained company of mutes." As for something Lord Spencer had said, Markiss described it as "a pure invention," which is much politer than Mr. Mantalini's way of referring to similar lapse as "a demnition lie." House sat as late as half-past six, and went off home in high good humour. "Quite a long time since we wet our spears," said the Markiss. "Just as well sometime, dear Toby, to show you fellows in the Commons what we can do."
Business done.—In Commons Financial Clause to Home-Rule Bill passed Second Reading.
House of Commons, Tuesday.—Don't Keir Hardie on again with fresh inquiry as to misadventure to one Arthur Walker on day of Royal Wedding. Mr. Walker (of London) it appears had difficulty with mounted officer in command of company of troops. Officer says that when ordered to fall back Walker seized his horse's rein. ARTHUR says "Walker!"; didn't do anything of the sort. That remains in dispute. What is clear is that Walker got slight scalp wound, inflicted by the warrior's sword. Don't Keir Hardie wants sworn inquiry into case. Campbell-Bannerman puts whole case in nutshell. "An accident," he says, "a regrettable accident; entirely owing to fact of the sharp edge of the sword meeting the man's head, instead of the flat edge."
That was all; but Walker seems to think it was enough. Carried out on a larger scale, before and since Waterloo, similar accidents have had even more direful results. But Campbell-Bannerman, by voice and manner, succeeded in throwing into explanation an amount of conviction that communicated itself to House, and even quietened Don't Keir Hardie. The choice of the word "meeting" was perhaps most exquisite touch in answer. Without venturing upon assertion, it conveyed impression that responsibility for regrettable occurrence was fully shared by Mr. Walker. Meeting implies advance from either side. To accomplish the contact, Mr. Walker's head must have advanced in the direction of the sword, which at the moment happened to be going the other way, unfortunately with the sharp edge to the front. Hence, between the two, the abrasion of Mr. Walker's skull.
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Campbell-Bannerman did not add another word, but everyone who knows his kindness of heart will understand his unuttered wish that when in future Walker takes his walks abroad he will be more careful. At least, if his head insists upon meeting swords going the other way, he may be expected to note whether it is the sharp edge or the flat that is out for the day.
Business done.—Financial Clause Home-Rule Bill in Committee. A long dull night, flashing forth at end in encounter between Joseph and his "right hon. friend." Mr. G. in tremendous force and vigour. In its way it was Campbell-Bannerman's story over again, Joseph's blameless head meeting the sharp edge of Mr. G.'s sword. Where difference came in was in circumstance that no one seemed to regard accident as regrettable. On contrary, whilst the Home-Rulers whooped in wild delight, the Opposition crowded the benches to watch the fun.