House of Commons, Monday, July 2.—"I am sorry," said Cap'en Tommy Bowles, "that there is no Chatham, Burke, or Fox alive at this moment to resist this project of taxing the Colonies."
In their unavoidable absence the Cap'en, contrary to his custom, offered a few remarks. It had been just as well if he had omitted the preliminary one. He really did not mean anything, much less did he desire deliberately to offend his friends Bartley, Butcher, and Byrne. But, as the poet remarks, Evil is wrought by want of thought, and the invidiousness of Tommy's remark lost nothing of sting because he had not intended to hurt anyone's feelings—except, of course, those of Squire of Malwood, and that is a legitimate occupation. When an enthusiastic female admirer observed to the eminent Whistler that he and Velasquez were the two greatest artists of times ancient or modern, Jemmy modestly observed, "Why drag in Velasquez?" Thus Bartley, Butcher, and Byrne turned upon Tommy with reproachful glance and murmured, "Why drag in Chatham, Burke, and Fox?"
However, all over now. The midnight bells chiming over sultry London proclaim passing of Budget Bill through Committee. Been a long hard fight, monotonous in its continuity, occasionally exciting in its divisions, continuously illustrative of Englishman's faculty of never knowing when he's beaten. Honours rest with Squire of Malwood, who throughout has unflinchingly and, in the main, good humouredly, borne the brunt of battle. The flesh is weak, especially when there is a good deal of it, and the thermometer stands at 82° in the shade. The Squire has snapped occasionally, Jokim's apologetic figure, upright at opposite side of table, proving unfailing, irresistible, incentive. Even worse to bear have been the desertion of a few followers and the importunity of many. Had the Squire been a weaker man, he would long ago have brought the Closure to bear on obstruction, and there would have followed a state of irritation, amid which, if Budget was not wrecked, it would have appropriated the whole time of an extended Session. The Squire, going on another tack, has worn out obstruction by affecting the virtue of urbanity if he had it not.
It was particularly hard lines, after getting Clause XXVII. through last Wednesday with a majority of over half a hundred, to be compelled to recommit Bill, in order that Clancy might chortle, and Redmond rage. Squire advised to resist; condemned from his own side when he yielded. But what happened? At quarter past ten to-night Bill recommitted in respect of this clause, and on stroke of midnight the whole thing was done with.
"We Liberals," said the Member for Sark, "always know better than our leaders. As there are many of us, and as we each take our individual view, result somewhat chaotic. Good thing if in comparative leisure of week end we think over how the Budget Bill was passed, and what would have happened if we had worried the Squire into going one of our diverse ways."
Business done.—Budget Bill.
Tuesday.—Enter the apothecary. It was Cap'en Tommy Bowles who brought him on. The last person in any one's mind. House in Committee on Army Estimates; Hanbury to the fore. Bound to live up to the 534 speeches he made and questions he put last year. Tommy then beat him by fourteen, and promises to be equally ahead in the current Session. The Cap'en hitherto had peculiar advantage, seeing that for many weeks he has been, so to speak, cruising in home waters. Having been brought up on legacy tax, teethed on death duties, Tommy surprised himself and the House with the command he displayed over intricacies of Budget Bill. Hanbury then fell behind. Now, with House in Committee on Army Estimates, he can show Tommy a clean pair of heels, a spectacle in which that eminent and able Marine may or may not take keen personal interest.
Hanbury began at once raising point of order; Mellor ruled him out like a shot; so went off on another tack. Adventured the startlingly novel proposition that "promotion should be by merit." Enlarged on the theme for twenty minutes; sat down only when he concluded that audience had fully mastered the proposition, contemplation of which was new to their bewildered mind.
It was at this stage Tommy towed in the apothecary. He appeared on the scene quite as abruptly as Romeo's acquaintance in the streets of Mantua:—
I do remember an apothecary,