"Honours Easy."—The St. James's Gazette suggests that if leading play-actors are to be knighted, why not principal music-hall singers? Well, not yet; as the chief music-hall singer is already "A Chevalier."


Youngster (who has just had a Penny given to him) "'Ow much is them Grapes, Mister?"

Shopkeeper (amused). "They are Four Shillings and Sixpence a Pound, my Lad."

Youngster. "Well, then, give us a 'A'porth o' Carrots. I'm a Demon for Fruit!"


A DERBY DIALOGUE.

Scene—In Town. Jones meets Brown.

Jones. Going to Epsom?