Lord Boreham (from behind his Newspaper). "Pray consider yourself excused this evening, Mr.——Mr.——a—I find I don't even know you by sight!"

[Which is quite true!


'ARRY AND THE NEW WOMAN.

Dear Charlie,—'Ow are you, old shipmate? I've bin layin' low for a time.

'Ard years these 'ere Nineties, my nibs, yus, and bizness 'as bin fur from prime.

All grind and no gay galoot, Charlie, of late 'as bin my little lot;

An' between you and me and the post, I think most things is going to pot!

It's Newness wot's doing it, Charlie! "Lor! that's a rum gospel," sez you.