James is annoyed about it. This is silly of him. As I point out, our soldiers have already earned a reputation abroad for gaiety and high spirits, and it is all to the good that the War Office should show that it has a sense of humour equally keen. When the invasion comes, and music-halls, cinemas and football matches are closed down, the amusement of the country (as the War Office has foreseen) will depend entirely upon us. Let us, then, obey rigidly the seven commandments of "recognition" and see how funny we can be.
For instance:—
At Headquarters.
[The Brigadier and the Adjutant—I beg pardon (don't shoot)—Father and Father's Help are discovered in conversation.]
Father (explaining orders). The Battalion will advance to-morrow towards Harwich, where the enemy——
Father's Help. Excuse me, Sir, but isn't that rather too military? How would this do?—"The brethren will walk out towards Harwich to-morrow, where the Band of Hope from another parish has already assembled."
In the Field.
Churchwarden Jones. Advance in half-pew rushes from the right!
Sidesman Tomkins. No. 1 half-pew, advance.... At the congregation in front at a thousand yards.
Parishioner Brown (to his neighbour). I say, how many bullets have you brought with you?