This is "What 'Roger' Hears" in The Northampton Daily Chronicle:—
"That a burglar entered 34, Birchfield road, Northampton, last evening, and decamped with several articles of jewellery while the residents, Mr. and Mrs. Mace, were out for an hour and a half.
That the Belgian guests who are being so generously entertained by the Mount Pleasant friends were present, and rendered musical items."
On police whistles, we hope.
Small boy. "What's on the poster, mother?"
Mother. "Only 'more gains and losses,' but whether on our side or the other it doesn't say."