[A German zoologist has discovered in German New Guinea a new kind of opossum to which he proposes to give the name of Dactylopsila Hindenburgi.]
At the Annual Convention of the Fishes, Birds and Beasts, Which opened with the usual invigorating feasts, The attention of the delegates of feather, fur and fin Was focussed on a wonderful proposal from Berlin.
The document suggested that, to signalise the feats Of the noble German armies and the splendid German fleets, Certain highly honoured species, in virtue of their claims, Should be privileged in future to adopt Germanic names.
To judge by the resultant din, the screams and roars and cries, The birds were most ungrateful and the quadrupeds likewise; And the violence with which they "voiced" their angry discontent Was worthy of a thoroughbred Hungarian Parliament.
The centipede declared he'd sooner lose a dozen legs Than wear a patronymic defiled by human dregs; And sentiments identical, in voices hoarse with woe, Were emitted by the polecat and by the carrion crow.
The rattlesnake predicted that his rattle would be cracked Before the name Bernhardii on to his tail was tacked; And an elderly hyæna, famed for gluttony and greed, Denounced the suffix Klucki as an insult to its breed.
Most impressive and pathetic was the anguish of the toad When he found the name Lissaueri had on him been bestowed; And a fine man-eating tiger said he'd sooner feed with Shaw Than allow the title Treitschkei to desecrate his jaw.
But this memorable meeting was not destined to disperse Without a tragedy too great for humble human verse; For, on hearing that Wilhelmi had to his name been tied, The skunk, in desperation, committed suicide.
Count Reventlow in the Deutsche Tageszeitung:—