EASIER SAID THAN DONE.
Tommies (singing). "Keep the home fires burning".
Visitor (at private hospital). "Can I see Lieutenant Barker, please?"
Matron. "We do not allow ordinary visiting. May I ask if you're a relative?"
Visitor (boldly). "Oh, yes! I'm his sister."
Matron. "Dear me! I'm very glad to meet you. I'm his mother."