Auctioneer (selling summer “grass-keep”). “Now then, how much for this field? Look at that grass, gentlemen. That’s the kind of stuff Nebuchadnezzar would have given ten pounds an acre for.”


For Prospective Centenarians.

“Salary, £50 per annum, rising upon satisfactory service by annual increments of £5 to a maximum of £880.”—Welsh Paper.


“Conscience Money.—The Chancellor of the Exchequer acknowledges the receipt of 10/- from Liverpool.

The charge for announcements in the Personal Column is 7/6 for two lines (minimum), and 3/6 for each additional line.”—Times.

Any large outbreak of conscientiousness on this scale will mean ruin for the country.