At this point there stood up a member whom I recognised as one of the committee. "I am sure, Sir," he said, "that all present are agreed that you fired in defence of the purity of English speech, and that the incident was the outcome of an unfortunate attempt to relieve the financial embarrassment of the club by relaxing our former rigorous exclusiveness. Speaking as one of the committee, I have no doubt that the affair will be dismissed as justifiable homicide."
Having bowed my acknowledgments I rang the bell. When the waiter appeared I bade him "Bring me a black coffee and then clear away the remains of Mr. Buttinbridge."
Then I was awakened by the voice of Buttinbridge yelling, "Wake up, old Sport!"
Grocer. "Now, my man, the butter you brought us last week—every packet of it weighed only fifteen ounces."
Farmer's Man. "Well, to be sure, Sir, we'd lost our one-pound weight; but we took one of your pound packets of tea to weigh it with."