Will be as dead as flowers that died
At some forgotten festival.
Rather Shifty.—"The Members of the Metropolitan Police Force," the Memorial stated, as quoted in the Times of June 13, urged the Government to concede, among other demands, this, which sounds peculiar:—
"Duty to consist of eight hours (in one shift) out of every twenty-four."
The words in brackets are a puzzle. Is "shift" a misprint for "shirt"? Is a Policeman now compelled to wear more than one of these in every twenty-four hours? Is it flannel or linen? We confess that we do not understand this, which we may fairly designate as "The Washerwoman's Clause."
Peregrinus Jocosus writes thus:—"Sir,—I was visiting Tintern Abbey. Admission is by a gateway, close to which is an instruction to ring the bell. How much simpler and pleasanter if the proprietor had written up, 'Tinternabbeylate!'—Yours, much pleased, P. J."
On Army Exams.—As long as Examinations are what they are, cramming is a necessity. Therefore, Mr. Punch has only one retort to present objections to cramming, and that is—"Stuff!"