If you wish to be fêted, applauded, caressed;

If you hope for receptions, and want an ovation,

By the populace cheered, by Town Councils addressed;

I can give you succinctly a certain receipt—

Be detected at once and denounced as a cheat.

It's as easy as lying; you eat all your cake, Sir,

And you have it as well, which was never a sin,

By adding a trifling amount to your stake, Sir,

When the points of the cards show you're certain to win.

You'll be slapped on the back by the "man in the street,"