Sub. Oh, don't you see? Why, the point is, you are not a bit like it-not a scrap like it! Next week I shall write and say that it's rubbish to call you a turncoat, because you have always been consistent.
Lead. (anxiously). But is anybody calling me a turncoat?
Sub. Not that I know of, but they might, don't you see. So it's as well to be on the safe side. I shall say that, if any one did call you a turncoat, that the speaker would prove himself a liar! That ought to give you a leg up, oughtn't it?
Lead. (with some hesitation). My dear friend, you are most kind; but if you don't mind, I would be so immensely obliged if you would leave my interests alone.
Sub. (with great cordiality). What, leave your interests alone! Never! You may be always sure of my hearty support!
Lead. (earnestly). But as a personal matter, I must beg of you kindly to leave me alone.
Sub. (reluctantly). Well, of course, if you make it a personal matter, I must consent. But the Party will suffer.
Lead. (dryly). Possibly—from your point of view. [Exeunt.
JAWFUL NEWS!—The Diminution of the Jaw in the Civilised Races is the title of a pamphlet by Mr. F. HOWARD COLLINS. We haven't read it; but if it be in favour of the diminution of "jaw," we heartily recommend its study to all Members of Parliament, actual or intending, and to all post-prandial speechmakers generally.