Wit. (in sepulchral tones). I do. But if his Lordship desires it, I will write my name on a piece of paper and pass it up.
Judge. Well, certainly, I think I ought to know everything, and— (Receives piece of paper disclosing the information, and starts back in his chair astonished). Dear me! Good gracious! Dear me!
First Lead. I think I should mention that I have not the faintest idea who this witness is, and only call him, acting under instructions. (To Witness.) Do you know anything about the matter in dispute?
Witness (with a sepulchral laugh). Ha! ha! ha! Nothing. Your question is indeed a good joke. Nothing, I repeat, absolutely nothing!
First Lead. (annoyed). Then you can sit down.
Second Lead. (sharply). Pardon me—not quite so fast! You say you know nothing about the matter in dispute, and yet you come here!
Witness (in a deeper voice than ever). Exactly.
Second Lead. But why, my dear Sir—Why? What is the point of it? Who may you be?
Witness. It is not may be—but who I am!
Second Lead. Well, tell us who you are. (Persuasively.) Come, who are you?