It was at this crisis that Herr VON POPOFF showed great presence of mind and absolute coolness. Without a moment's hesitation he requested that the fragments of paper might be given to him. Taking them in his right hand, he placed them in the turban he had previously used for manufacturing his pound-cake, and once more repeated his magic formula.
To the general surprise (and I must not omit my own individuality from the universal astonishment) he produced a new Treaty, which I then had the honour of handing to the Sultan for signature.
The Treaty (which was subsequently discovered to contain several important concessions to the country I have the honour to represent) was then signed, and the prestidigitateur and I retired loaded with honours.
I have, in conclusion, to beg permission to wear the Sheriffian Order of the Diamond-eyed Pig of the Second Class. The Sun-Star of the Emerald Life-sized White Elephant of the Double First-Class has already been accepted by Herr VON POPOFF, as that gentleman, being a foreign subject, has no need to desire official authorisation to use his recently-acquired and extremely bulky decoration.
"GROUSE DRIVING."
MEMORABLE.
SIR,—So many punning Epitaphs have recently appeared in the Times à propos of "BOB LOWE," that I am sure you will now allow me to produce and publish what was rejected by your Editor, long before the decease of the above-mentioned eminent Statesman. I thought it, and still think it, uncommonly good; but the then Editor said, "No—it is unseemly to joke about the decease of a living celebrity." Now on the good old maxim of "Nil nisi bonum," I beg you will produce this, as I'm sure it is, and always was, uncommonly bonum, and like good wine, all the better for keeping. Here it is:—