I went to the "halls" crusading, And I found what I meant to find. I had said they were all degrading, And I never alter my mind.
In virtue strong I gazed at the throng Of smoking chatters and grinners; With a righteous frown my soul looked down On the publicans and the sinners.
Loftily, proudly, lonely I bore what I had to bear, For I knew that I was the only Respectable Person there!
That the others were not respectable Was easy and plain to see, For they frankly found delectable What didn't appeal to me.
Yet none of the revellers stonily, Or scornfully seem'd to stare, They took no note of the only Respectable Person there.
My vigilant virtue perchance may hurt you By putting constructions worse on The pose or picture that draws no strictures From the non-respectable person.
But my earliest vigilance wakèd To look askance at the nude, As another name for naked, And therefore distinctly rude.
From an icy peak of stupendous cheek On an alien world I glare, And never feel lonely, although I'm the only Respectable Person there!
Wonderful Feat OF Strength.—The strong man supporting four men on a chair is nothing in comparison with an entire train "held up" by four men! This was reported in the Pall Mall Gazette last Saturday as having occurred to a "Texas Pacific train." The armed robbers went off with 20,000 dollars. Nice "Pacific" train to travel by!