AN AUTHORITY ON FASHION.
Jones (who has come to stay the night at Little Peddlington Hall, and finds he's forgotten to bring his white ties). "I want some White Evening Ties, please."
The Village Draper. "I'm sorry we 'aven't got any in Stock, Sir. You see the White Tie Season has 'ardly commenced!"
SIGNS OF THE TIMES.
At the re-opening of the Royal United Service Institution last week by H.R.H. the Prince of Wales, in new premises at Whitehall, a novel and ingenious electrical instrument was exhibited. By means of this addition to the list of communicators a general in the field is able not only to send an autograph letter to a colleague or subordinate at a distance, but also to convey in fac simile a drawing of his own composition. On the occasion to which reference is made, the Prince of Wales sent a message to his brother. To this despatch the Duke of Connaught was obliged to respond that he did not quite understand its full meaning. According to the reports some slight error was rectified, and then the machine worked to everyone's satisfaction. However, the fact remains that the initial attempt to convey intelligibly a message was not entirely successful. To impress upon those answerable for the perfect action of the instrument the importance of their task, we subjoin an imaginary scene of a nearly impossible situation. We will assume that a commander-in-chief is conversing with a general in the field some ten miles distant.
Commander-in-Chief (wiring). We hear here that a force of twenty-five thousand infantry are advancing by the Dover road with a view to turning your left front.
General in the Field. Kindly repeat. (Message repeated.) No, we do not want any more marmalade, as we have plenty of butter.
C.-in-C. I said nothing about marmalade, I was talking of the enemy. Twenty-five thousand men are advancing on your left front.