Conversation of the moment in a City restaurant:—

Regular Customer (looking down menu). "Waiter, why is cottage pie never on now?"

Waiter. "Well, Sir, since this 'ere shortage of 'ouses we ain't allowed to make 'em any more."

THE REVIVAL OF THE FITTEST.

(Written after reading Mr. Francis W. Galpin's "Old English Instruments of Music.")

I am no skilful vocalist;

I can't control my mezza gola;

I have but an indifferent fist