That's a hit at somebody, too, I shouldn't wonder. Somebody must have written a topical verse for the occasion. Those people are still eating. I expect they are doing Hog-money, or whatever it is....
Are you still as obstinate as ever about that hot-water bottle? Very well, then, I shall now have the first smoke of the New Year. Oh, no; we 've got to do Auld Lang Syne first. I never can smoke while I'm singing.
"Should auld acquaintance ..." Do you know any of the people here? No? Do you ever want to see any of them again? No? Never mind, they've all paid a lot of money to hold our hands; let them have their money's worth ... "A right gude willie-waucht ..." Waiter! One large willie-waucht, please, and a small pint stoup ... Do you realise that this is the only night in the year when you can get a willie-waucht at this hour? What a world!
Six years. Do you see that nice couple over there? I bet they haven't been married as long as we have. And I bet they're not so bankrupt. This is going to be a dreadful year. I can see that at once. But we'll keep the flag flying.
Ah, here come the willie-wauchts. Thank you, waiter.
Well, my dear—a cup of kindness with you. Here's luck!
A. P. H.
Natural History on the Football Field.
"St. Columb's Court and North-End met at The Farm, when St. Columb's Court were the victors by three goats to one."
—Irish Paper.