Spinks (aloud). "Oh, nonsense—nonsense, man! You're an idiot. Here, take this bird, and kill it!"
[Seizes cage, thrusts it into the flustered Jarp's arms, and pushes him off, the Parrot, horribly frightened, yelling, "Old fool!"
Lady Surbiton. How dare he speak of Penelope in that way? Kill her! If Mr. Jarp so much as lays a finger upon her——
Lord S. She'll bite him. Oh, you may make your mind quite easy about that parrot. She's bitten every finger of mine to the bone, and I'm certain she's quite equal to defending herself against Jarp.
The Act proceeds without any further hitch, until Belinda wheels on her double perambulator containing two red-headed infants, one of whom is terrified into tears and calls for "Father!" in a shrill voice. After this everything, however, goes well, and the Curtain falls amidst thunders of applause.
Behind the Curtain.
Spinks. Yes, Gushby, I believe you did it. You were closeted with that parrot for an hour yesterday. I believe you deliberately taught it to say that, in order to crab my part. What's more, I'm certain of it, for I distinctly recognised your voice in the parrot's.
Gushby. Pooh! nonsense! If I had taught it to say anything, it would have been something worse than that, you may be sure.
Spinks. You always were kind. As for Jarp, he was in the plot. Otherwise do you think any man could have made such a fool of himself?
In Front of the Curtain.