Tentative heroes may suit modern urgency,
LUBBOCK may win where a Hercules fails.
If we now hunt, upon public emergency,
Stymphalian Birds, 'tis with salt for their tails!
"YE GODS, WHAT A TERRIBLE TWIST!"
Statistics are sweet things, and full of startling surprises. Like the Frenchman in "Killaloe" "you never know what they'll be up to next." Here, for instance, is a "statement showing the decrease in price in the United States of many articles within the past ten years largely consumed by the agricultural community." And among these "many articles" "largely consumed," are "mowing machines, barb fence-wire, horseshoes, forks, wire-cloth, slop-buckets, wheelbarrows, and putty." No wonder dyspepsia is the national disease in America. Fancy "consuming" French staples, pie-plates (though they sound almost edible), and putty!!! The ostrich is supposed to be capable of digesting such dainties as broken bottles, and tenpenny nails, but that voracious fowl is evidently not "in it" with the "Agricultural community" of America.
ODD.—A Correspondent says he found this advertisement in the Guardian:—
RECTOR of S. Michael's, Lichfield, requires help of a LAY-READER. Visiting, S.-school, cottage services, ass. in choir, &c. Good salary.