"One day the wise men of Gotham sed one to another:
"'Let us bild us a tower which H.G. can't flood, if he dams from now till dooms-day.'
"A big injun took the contract. As OOFTY GOOFT, a dutch German, remarkt,
"'He vash got Tam-many oder braves to give him a boosht.'
"Street pavements were laid on 5th avenoo, which the wind took up, and the air smelt like a mixture of cold tar and Scotch snuff.
"Bulls and Bears of Wall street had a day of Egypshun darkness; it was called Black Friday.
"'Shoo-fly' was sung in our nashunal Councils.
"Banks were robbed, and Judges went snucks with the robbers.
"Men got on fits of temper-ary insanity and clubbed their wives over the head or popped off editors with a 6 shooter.
"Virtous and respectable ladies were Spencerized in the Halls of Gustise, and the 12 temptashuns was drawin' crowded houses."