Open wide ye golden gates
That lead to the heavenly shore.
Our father suffered in passing through
And mother weighs much more.
The winter snow congealed his form
But now we know our Uncle's warm.
Our papa dear has gone to Heaven
To make arrangements for eleven.
Epitaph on a dentist.
View this gravestone with gravity
He is filling his last cavity.
Here lies Dodge, who dodged all good
And dodged a deal of evil.
But after dodging all he could
He could not dodge the devil.
On the tombstone of a disagreeable old man.
"Deeply regretted by all who never knew him."
Here lies Jim Shaw, attorney-at-law.
When he died the devil cried,
Give me your paw, Jim Shaw,
Attorney at law.
Here lies my wife a sad slatterned shrew
If I said I regretted her I should lie too.