“Where are you driving the pig, Paddy?” “To Limerick, your honor.” “Limerick! this is the Cork road.” “Hush, speak low, I’m only pretending; if it knew I was wanting it to go to Cork, it would take the Limerick road.”
The Turkey and Rattlesnake:
A FABLE.
On a fine day in summer, a wild turkey was walking along over one of the prairies of the far West. As the sun shone upon his glossy neck, he cast his eye downward, and seemed lost in admiration of his own beauty.
While engaged in this way, he heard something hissing in the grass; and soon a rattlesnake issued from the spot, and, coiling himself up, placed himself before the turkey. The latter grew very red in the face, spread his tail and wings to their utmost extent, and, having strutted back and forth several times, approached the snake, and spoke as follows:
“You impudent serpent! Was it you that I heard laughing at me in the bushes? How dare you laugh at me, the handsomest cock-turkey of the whole prairie? Have I not the reddest wattles, and the largest comb, the blackest wing, and the glossiest neck of any bird that is seen on the plain? Did not my grandfather swallow an alligator alive, and could I not take down such a little, insignificant thing as you, without winking?”
“Don’t put yourself in a passion,” said the serpent in reply, at the same time swelling up, his flesh writhing, and the colors of his skin growing very bright. “Don’t put yourself in a passion; I know you’re a coward, like the whole of your race, and you are as vain as you are timid.”
Upon this, the turkey seemed bursting with rage; his throat was so choked, that he could not speak distinctly, but he gobbled the louder. He also strutted round in a circle, grating the ends of his wings upon the ground. At length he came bristling up toward the serpent, who, being mortally offended, coiled himself into a ball, and springing toward the turkey, struck him in the neck with his fangs, and inflicted a fatal wound. The latter in return gave the serpent a deep scratch in his side, and both fell dead upon the ground.
A wise ant, that dwelt in a little hillock near by, and saw the whole affray, crawled to the spot, and made the following sage observations: “It would seem that this vast prairie were wide enough for the creatures that dwell upon it to live together in peace; but, alas! their angry passions lead to strife, and strife ends in death. Nor is this all. As the poison of the serpent taints these carcasses, so an evil name always follows those who ‘die as the fool dieth.’”