3d. Attitudes. In this term, I include walking, marching, riding and evolutions in general; in all which my followers exhibit a wonderful sameness. You would at once perceive that they had been disciplined by the same master, and were actuated by the same spirit. The many graces of action are probably better understood by them, than by any other people on the globe. I have often been in ecstasies, in looking at one of my veterans, advancing towards me—he has given me such a delightful idea of Hogarth’s waving line of beauty. But my mounted volunteers are, perhaps, my greatest pride. In elegant horsemanship, they excel. I doubt whether Mohammed himself, when he rode Alborak, presented a finer appearance than some of our Knights of the Bottle. They are so easy—so full of elegant motion—now on this side—now on that—forwards and backwards—lateral, circular, and zigzag, that you would decide it to be equal to any “ground tumbling” you ever met with. And with all their courtesies, for they seldom pass any one without making a profound bow—they seldom lose their balance so as to fall. This I account for, in some instances at least, from the sagacity of their horses, which usually know more than their riders!
A fourth characteristic is Independence. My followers are ever ready to pay me and my family the honors of sovereignty; but here their homage terminates. They are, to a man, freemen, and have taken their oath a thousand times, that they will live freely, however they may die. They sing beautifully, and sincerely, especially such couplets as these:
“He that lives and goes to bed mellow,
Lives as he ought to do, and dies a clever fellow.”
Generally, they feel rich, however poor; and have golden prospects, without the certainty of a single dollar. I have known them, even when lying at the bottom of a ditch, and unable to move a limb—so buoyant with spirits, as to call out to the universe—“to the right wheel, march!”
A fifth characteristic of my subjects is, genius. The tendency of all my influence is to bring the energies of the skull into action. Under my tuition, genius is sure to expand; and I have known even those who were thought to be wanting in common sense, to have heads that would delight Spurzheim himself. Phrenologists often talk about bumps, as indications of great powers. This is sound philosophy, and I have a mode of making bumps by an expeditious process. I assure you, I have known a whole family of geniuses made in one night, at a bar-room or a grog-shop. A jug of the pure thing is superior to a college education, for developments of the craniology.
Finally, my friends, one of my people knows more than anybody else—or he thinks he does, which is the same thing. It is an old adage, that “the drunken man thinks the world turns round.” What a glorious privilege! It is true that he reels and staggers, and perhaps tumbles down; but still, he thinks that he alone is upright, steadfast and perpendicular! while everybody else is tipping and diving as if there was an earthquake! Is not this an enviable superiority? Thus it is, my friends, if you embrace me, you will, in your own heart and mind, be
——“glorious,
O’er all your enemies victorious!”
You may be clothed in rags, tumbled into a gutter—an object of pity and sorrow to all around; yet, strong in your confidence in me, you will remain