A WHIMSICAL IDEA.
A noble lord asked a clergyman at the foot of his table, why, if there was a goose at dinner, it was always placed next the parson. "Really," said he, "I can give no reason for it; but your question is so odd, that I shall never after see a goose without thinking of your lordship."
THE BREECHES-MAKER CAPTAIN.
A captain in a volunteer corps, drilling his company, had occasion to desire one of the gentlemen to step farther out in marching. The order not being attended to, was repeated in a peremptory tone, when the private exclaimed, "I cannot, captain, you have made my breeches too tight."
TIT FOR TAT.
Two contractors, who had made large fortunes, had a quarrel. One of them, in the midst of the altercation, asked the other contemptuously, "Do you remember, Sir, when you were my footman?" The other answered, "I do; and had you been my footman, you would have been a footman still."
SOUND ARGUMENT.
A sailor being about to set out for India, a citizen asked him:
"Where did your father die?"
"In shipwreck."