THE ANTIGALLICAN.
A Frenchman in a coffee-house called for a gill of wine, which was brought him in a glass. He said it was the French custom to bring wine in a measure. The waiter answered, "Sir, we wish for no French measures here."
SWEET DEFINITION.
A sprightly school girl who attends the "Central High," where the teachers have a way of inciting the pupils to understand what they say in the classes, was reading the "Last of the Huggermuggers;" and stirred by the spirit of inquiry, stimulated by her teachers, if not by natural feminine curiosity, asked a boy cousin of hers, the meaning of huggermugger. John looked thoughtful for a moment, and then said—"I'll show you;" and before the incipient woman had time to make any further remark, John had his arm around her waist, and subjected it to a gentle pressure—"That's hugger; and this," putting his lips to hers in affectionate collision, "is mug ger!" "Yes," said the not more than half displeased Sarah Ann, "and this is the last of the huggermuggers, for if you ever attempt to give me another such definition, I'll box your ears. I've a great mind to tell Mr. Hall, as I go to school, what sort of dictionary you are carrying about you all the time."—Boston Transcript.
COULDN'T AFFORD IT.
"I don't care much about the bugs," said Mr. Wormly to the head of a genteel private boarding house, "but the fact is, Madam, I havn't the blood to spare—you see that yourself."
PULL DEVIL—PULL BAKER.
A question for the Spike Society. "Would the devil beat his wife if he had one?" "Guess not—for the women generally beat the devil."
PROVOKING.
"Hallo, boy, did you see a rabbit cross the road there just now?"