A gentleman expatiating upon the good looks of women, declared that he had never yet seen an ugly woman. One who was extremely flat nosed, said,
"Sir, I defy you not to find me ugly."
"You, madam," he replied, "are an angel fallen from heaven, only you have fallen on your nose."
KEEN RETORT.
A priest said to a peasant whom he thought rude, "You are better fed than taught." "Shud think I was," replied the clodhopper, "as I feeds myself and you teaches me."
THE AUCTIONEER AT HOME.
An auctioneer, vexed with his audience, said: "I am a mean fellow—mean as dirt—and I feel at home in this company."
SACKS AND BAGS.
Mr. Lover tells a good anecdote of an Irishman giving the pass-word at the battle of Fontenoy, at the same time the great Saxe was marshal.
"The pass-word is Saxe; now don't forget it, Pat," said the Colonel.