It is well—or, better said, it is ill.
The first ostrich eggs procured by the Spaniards, in their voyages to Africa, were regarded as marvels, and deposited, either as offerings or ex-votos, in the churches, where, bound and tied with gay ribbons, they hung before the altars and were looked upon as ornaments of great value. And even now, before modest altars in humble villages are sometimes seen these enormous eggs; presenting with their worn and faded decorations the appearance of porcelain melons. By whom were they brought? where were they found? who hung them here? are questions that assault the mind of the beholder, and send his thoughts and fancy into the vast field of conjectures impossible to verify, but all sweet, romantic, and holy.
The imagination of the Spanish people is an instinct. They cannot see a material object without attaching to it an ideal. Out of the fervor of their own heart they made a symbol of this.
The belief adapted to the ostrich egg, hung in front of the altar, is one that will be sagely qualified by sanctimonious devotees of literal truth as superstitious and fanatical. We offer it to the Protestant missionaries who favor us with their propaganda, as a killing weapon against the benighted and malignant papists.
It is said that the mother-bird cannot hatch these eggs, which appear to be of marble, because it is impossible for her to cover them, and because there is not heat enough in her body to warm them through; but that she has in her look such fire, kindled by her great desire to free her offspring, that by keeping her eyes continuedly and without distraction fixed upon the eggs, the ardor and concentration of her love penetrates the hard shell and delivers her little ones. And they hung these eggs before the places where the holy sacrifice of the mass is offered, to teach us to keep our eyes fixed upon the altar with equal desire, equal love, and exclusive attention and devotion. O poets! if you would fulfil your mission, which is to move the heart, learn less in palaces, and more from the people who feel and believe.
Among sayings and proverbs that have been accepted everywhere without having to show their parentage, is the well-known expression, Ahi me las den todas: May I get them all there.
One of the creditors of a certain dishonest fellow, that owed all the world and paid nobody, laid his complaint before the judge, who sent an alguacil to suggest to the debtor the necessity of paying at once.
For response to the intimation, the debtor gave the alguacil, who was a very dignified man, a slap on his face. The latter, returning to the tribunal, addressed the magistrate thus: "Sir, when I go to notify an individual on the part of your worship, whom do I represent?" "Me," answered the judge. "Well, sir," proceeded the alguacil, touching his cheek, "to this cheek of your worship they have given a slap." "May I get them all there," replied the judge.
Here is the etymology of another saying, Quien no te conozea te compre: Let some one buy you that don't know you. Three poor students came to a village where there was a fair. "What shall we do to amuse ourselves?" asked one as they were passing a garden in which an ass was drawing water from a well. "I have already hit upon a way," answered another of the three. "Put me into the machine, and you take the ass to the fair and sell him." As it was said, so it was done. When his companions had gone, the student that had remained in the place of the ass stood still. "Arre!" [Footnote 184] shouted the gardener, who was at work not far off.