“Up stairs, No. 4, sir,” said the waiter, as he flourished a dirty napkin, indicating the way.
Up stairs I went, and in due time the appetizing little dejeune made its appearance. Never did a miser’s eye revel over his broad acres with more complacent enjoyment than did mine skim over the mutton and the muffin, the teapot, the trout, and the devilled kidney, so invitingly spread out before me. Yes, thought I, as I smacked my lips, this is the reward of virtue; pickled pork is a probationary state that admirably fits us for future enjoyments. I arranged my napkin upon my knee, I seized my knife and fork, and proceeded with most critical acumen to bisect a beefsteak. Scarcely, however, had I touched it, when with a loud crash the plate smashed beneath it, and the gravy ran piteously across the cloth. Before I had time to account for the phenomenon, the door opened hastily, and the waiter rushed into the room, his face redolent with smiles, while he rubbed his hands in an ecstacy of delight.
“It’s all over, sir;” said he, “glory be to God, it’s all done.”
“What’s over? what’s done?” said I with impatience.
“M’Mahon is satisfied,” replied he, “and so is the other gentleman.”
“Who and what the devil do you mean?”
“It’s over, sir, I say,” replied the waiter again; “he fired in the air.”
“Fired in the air,” said I. “Did they fight in the room below stairs?”
“Yes, sir,” said the waiter with a benign smile.
“That will do,” said I, as seizing my hat I rushed out of the house, and hurrying to the beach took a boat for the ship. Exactly half an hour had elapsed since my landing, but even those short thirty minutes had fully as many reasons, that although there may be few more amusing, there are some safer places to live in than the green island.