"Naw. It's no good, and I tell you straight, I'm mighty sorry I learned it."—Technical World.
WHAT FIELD WANTED.
Eugene Field, sad of countenance and ready of tongue, strayed into a New York restaurant and seated himself at a table. To him there came a swift and voluble waiter, who said:
"Coffee, tea-chocolate, ham 'n' 'ggs—beef-steak—mutton—chop—fishballs—hash'n'—beans," and much more to the same purpose.
Field looked at him long and solemnly, and at last replied:
"Oh, friend, I want none of these things. All I require is an orange and a few kind words."
DECIDEDLY "WILLIN'."
Miss Maude Adams has a favorite story about a certain "Miss Johnsing" and an uncertain "Culpeper Pete."
Pete became enamored of the dusky maiden and not having the courage to "pop" face to face, called up the house where she worked and asked for her over the telephone. When he got her on the line he asked:
"Is dat Miss Johnsing?"