There is no experience more heavily fraught with deep ghastly lonesomeness than that of being shaved by a deaf-and-dumb barber.
—Washington Star.
Mrs. Gabb—What is the matter with my husband?
Doctor—Nothing, except that he needs change. I prescribe opiates and rest.
Mrs. Gabb—Shall I give him the opiates at once?
Doctor—Oh, the opiates are not for him; they are for you.
—Once a Week.