Grocer's wife (anxiously)—Oh, Jim, are you hurt?
Grocer (savagely, but with dignity)—Go away, woman; what do you know about war?
—Liverpool Post.
Very Necessary.
Minister (to Johnny, who is digging worms for bait)—Johnny, don't you know that it is wrong for you to do any work except work of necessity on the Sabbath?
Johnny—Necessity? Ain't this necessity? How's a feller to do any fishin' if he don't have bait?