There's something attractive about her:
It isn't her beauty of face,
It isn't her ribbons of lace,
But there's something attractive about her,
And I swear that I can't live without her,
And that is the state of the case.
There's something attractive about her,
It isn't her glance or her smile,
It isn't her elegant style;
But I'm poor and I can't live without her,
For that something attractive about her,
You know, is the size of her pile.
—Boston Courier.
Deaf But Sensible.
Traveler (in buggy)—This is a hot day.
Old Farmer (in a potato patch)—Speakin' to me?
Traveler—This is a hot day.
Old Farmer (coming to the fence)—What did you say, mister?