"Jack," said a commercial traveller to a country joskin, "which is the way to Harlingford?" "How did you know my name was Jack?" inquired the countryman. "Why, I guessed it," replied the bagman. "Then guess your way to Harlingford," says Jack, "for I shan't tell you."
"John, what is the past of see?" "Seen, sir." "No, it is saw—recollect that." "Yes, sir. Then if a sea-fish swims by me, it becomes a saw-fish when it is past, and can't be seen." "You may go home, John."
Judge Peters, a Philadelphian and a punster, having observed to another judge on the bench that one of the witnesses had a vegetable head, "How so?" was the inquiry. "He has carroty hair, reddish cheeks, a turnup nose, and a sage look."
"John," screamed a country girl, seated by the side of her dull lover, "leave me alone!" John, astonished, cried, "Why, I ain't a-touching yer!" "No," replied she, "but you might have done—if you liked."
"Jim, why is it that a musician's strains are always heard so much less distinctly when he plays alone, than when in a band?"—"Why, I didn't know it was so—suppose it must be because he plays so-lo."