There were new complications and things began to look more and more serious. Every day when I awoke a fear came over me that the news would be brought: “we are to march.”
From time to time disguised Turkish officers, spies for certain, began to appear in Alexandropol. There were some skirmishes in the town, unfriendly demonstrations between the Christians and the Mussulmans. A great activity was noticeable in Alexandropol, and I listened to the sounds of drums and the rumble of the big guns through the streets with increasing uneasiness.
On Easter night we went to the citadel church for divine service; a score of Cossacks lighted our way with torches. The next day we had a great number of congratulators who came in to embrace us, according to our Orthodox practice, in commemoration of Christ’s Resurrection. It was curious to see amongst them “devil-worshippers,” belonging to Loris-Melikoff’s escort.
Events were advancing faster than I anticipated; the storm-cloud which had been gathering had burst at last, and the time of trial had come. A telegram informed Loris-Melikoff that the Ambassador of Russia had received the
order to quit Constantinople; a second despatch followed saying: “if Turkey did not consent to sign the conditions that Russia exacted, war would be declared in the lapse of two days.” And Turkey did not consent.
On the 11th of April, the first anniversary of our wedded life, we invited some friends to dine with us. Just when our health was going to be drunk, my husband was hastily summoned by Loris-Melikoff whom he found reading a cyphered telegram which announced the declaration of war against Turkey.
Having agreed not to divulge these alarming tidings, Sergy tried to look cheery when he returned home, but I saw at a glance that he was very pale and nervous, and guessed at once that he had brought bad news; when I heard him give orders to have his horse ready at any time of the night, I understood all. He had to go! Oh, to think of it! Oh, to think of it! For some minutes I could not collect my faculties, everything swam before my eyes, it was altogether such a terrible blow! The first shock of horrible surprise over, I resolved to show myself as self-possessed as I could. Time enough for tears and grief when Sergy would be gone!
The order was given to our cavalry to attack the twenty Turkish posts who guarded the frontier at nightfall; only three of them defended themselves, all the others were taken unawares; being plunged into deep sleep, they were taken captives. It was the first act of open hostility.
Oh, the terrible night! Of sleep there was no question whatever! Before the stepping out of our troops, in the cold grey light of a rainy dawn, a Te-Deum was performed in the square in front of the cathedral. The soldiers, after having concluded their fervent prayers, took a pinch of earth, kissed the dear ground and laid it in their knapsacks. Many eyes filled with tears at this touching spectacle.
Until this moment no one in town had suspected that war had been declared. All Alexandropol was in a great state of excitement; the Armenians, especially, were awfully frightened and depressed.
At seven in the morning our troops left Alexandropol. The heart-breaking hour had come, the sad word “farewell” was to be said. I cried out, “Good-bye my all, good-bye!” and pressed my wet cheek to Sergy’s tear-stained one, like my own. After a short prayer, we held each other in a close embrace; I couldn’t believe that he was really going. At last I mastered myself with an effort, and disengaged my clinging arms with a last kiss. It was the worst moment I had ever had in my life. There was an instant of unconsciousness, and when I recovered myself he was gone! I hadn’t the strength to accompany Sergy to the front door, and flinging myself upon my bed, face downwards, I sobbed as I had never sobbed before. Oh! now I was alone, alone, alone! Suddenly I sprang up and stretched out my hands to the blank distance, cried aloud: “Come back, Sergy, come back, my sweetheart, I cannot let you go!” But he was already gone past recall. I shall certainly never forget that day. It seemed as if my life had ended. Oh, my God, if I could only die!