When I stops at th’ cabin I ain’t wearin’ no pants, but I got uh’ strangle holt on that ol’ badger. Pore ol’ Abie gits loose about half-way home, and he shore moves spry-like to th’ top of th’ cabin, where he orates his displeasure and shows symptoms uh liver trouble. They helps me hog-tie that badger, and then Mighty complains uh heap about his pet.
“Ike, yuh ought to be careful about Abe,” sez he. “There wa’n’t no sense in gittin’ him all excited thataway. Mebby he’ll have uh relapse, and I ain’t got uh liver pill left. He’s uh sick animile.”
“Th’ —— he is!” sez I. “He tore my pants off, and almost clears th’ cabin in one jump, so I don’t reckon he’s so danged bad off. We got female folks at our house, so I reckon yuh better loan me uh pair uh pants to go home in, Mighty.”
He ain’t got nothin’ but uh pair uh overalls, which don’t meet by six inches at th’ waist and lingers jist below th’ knee, but I puts ’em on. We ties th’ badger to uh pole, which me and Magpie packs, and Mighty leads Abe and his bellyache with uh rope. Big Foot’s prospect ain’t been worked fer so long that it’s all grown up ag’in and looks like uh natcheral cave.
“Here’s th’ idea,” states Magpie. “We’ll put th’ bear and badger in th’ ol’ tunnel. Then we’ll git th’ perfessor and his outfit to come over and see us separate them. We’ll keep that alleged cub over to th’ cabin long enough to satisfy th’ perfessor. Sabe?”
“You got another think comin’ if you thinks that Abe and that ol’ badger is goin’ to hibernate peaceful like in that hole while yu goes over to head th’ peerade,” objects Mighty. “Since Ike stirred ’em up thataway, Abe ain’t acted noways friendly toward th’ badger, and said badger ain’t got no love fer nobody after ridin’ upside down on uh pole fer two miles. How am I goin’ to know how Abie’s bellyache is, all this time. I can’t stay with him.”
“Do you think I’m goin’ to lose all that money jist because there ain’t no love lost between two dumb brutes?” snorts Magpie. “Big Foot must uh been afraid that somebody was goin’ to invade his ol’ prospect when he built that door at th’ entrance, but he shore simplified things fer us. We’ll stick Abe and his imitation cub inside an’ block th’ door. By th’ time we git back they’ll be friendly ag’in.”
“Abie’s bellyache—” begins Mighty, but Magpie shuts him up.
“Gosh A’mighty, you gives me uh pain! No wonder that pore bear’s got uh stummick ache. You’d give uh wooden Injun th’ pip, Mighty. Mebby if yuh quits givin’ him all them patent medicines he’d be uh heap better bear and last longer. That stuff’s causin’ all his hair to come out. If yuh don’t quit he won’t even make uh decent rug.”
Abie goes in plumb willin’ but the badger objects. He tries to squeeze out, but twistin’ uh stick in his hide sorta disgusts him and he retires. Mighty pilgrims off home, and me and Magpie goes back to our cabin.