To crack a head and break a heart,
Are known as Paddy's forte;
In kitchen, jail, or low-back cart—
No matter where—he 'll court.
To don a rig, and dance a jig,
Attend a wake or wedding,
He 'll sell his own or neighbor's pig
And only rag of bedding.
He lives a happy, careless life,
Hand to mouth, and heart in hand;
Ready for either love or strife,
Building castles on the sand.
With peck of trouble ever full,
Good measure, running over,
He deals in stock—the Irish bull,
And with it, lives in clover.
Love's labor is the only taste
That Paddy's mind inherits:
He thinks, where maidens run to waste,
The harem has its merits.
And so Dobeen, upon his course,
Love's gallop quick began;
The gal up on the other horse,
He courted, as they ran.
The bows around the maid were more
Than suited to her mind;
Cupid and Shamus rode before,
The savage rode behind.
They each pursued the maiden coy,
Two wooed her a la bow;
The arrow tips of one were joy,
The other's tips were woe.
'T is said that Shamus won the race,
And saved his hair and bacon:
If Mary loved his wooing pace,
His heart may stop its achin'.
And this was the Professor's letter, which had evidently set the aldermanic machine to grinding doggerel again:
| "On the Solomon, | } |
| Lindsey, Ottawa County, Kansas. | } |
... "I have run down here after my mail. Am progressing finely with my studies. Shamus had an adventure yesterday. Mary and he rode over on horseback to a neighbor's, a mile away, and on the return were pursued by an Indian. Hard riding brought them in safely. Mary tells her mistress that, during the terrors of the chase, Shamus would not refrain from courting. He lashed her horse, and spurred his, and popped the question, alternately.
"I shall probably remain here a month or so longer, as I am much interested in the Flora of the Solomon Valley."
The italicized word in the last sentence is underscored, and its initial letter bears evidence of having been maliciously transformed into a capital by Sachem.
THE END.