This rescued one told delightful and beautiful stories about a land which had a delicious twilight always; was filled with sweet streams and odorous lakes; where large trees grew bearing excellent fruit; where were flocks of sheep of a peculiar kind, but very tender and juicy, and other animals equally fit to sustain life.
Such effect had these stories, that with one accord all the pink-eyed people descended into this new country.
In course of time it became a custom with them to celebrate their release from torture, and at such times they made great fires at the mouths of winding natural wells which led to the surface of the earth. Now, these fires were so fierce because of the draught they melted the sides of the holes and the suction carried the molten matter out into the air.
So it was volcanoes came to be used as a token of joy, as well as to communicate to the people of the earth above that these people were not only still in existence but exceedingly and gloriously happy.
Occasionally some of these people come up onto the earth on visits and they are termed Albinos.
And these people have a great many drinks which they store in great caverns by air pressure, using great electric engines for the purpose of forcing it to all parts of their realm. Once in a while the people of the earth bore down into one of these reservoirs and there spurts up one of these drinks. They are called mineral springs.
By way of finale then.
I am aware, according to the tradition as remitted to future generations by one of my grandfathers, the different seasons are due to the tipping of the earth by one of our ancestors prying over the North Pole. But there is a tradition which comes down my mother’s side of the family, which is so logical and so true to nature and man it deserves a place in the archives of our history. I will therefore be pardoned for inserting it here. I have had reverence at all times for the veracity of the historical account to which I allude, and I desire it understood at the outset I pass no judgment on it, but leave the matter to the reader’s acumen and discernment to distinguish and decide between them.
One of the great-grandfathers of my wife (in fact, I believe it was her remote ancestor, who of course must have been related to my remote ancestor) made weekly trips into space.