Another famous stomach bitters was found to contain, according to an official State analysis, 44 per cent. of alcohol; another mixture contained 20 per cent. of alcohol; a certain blood bitters contained 25 per cent. of alcohol; a sarsaparilla 26 per cent.; a celery compound 21 per cent.; the malt whiskey is in this class and is a particularly obnoxious fraud, for it pretends to be a medicine and to relieve all kinds of lung and throat disease. It is especially favored by temperance people because in this way they get their "grog" in the guise of a medicine. It is sold in many places across the bar of saloons at 15 cents per drink, as many other brands of rye and Bourbon whisky are sold.
Think of treating any disease of the stomach with the famous stomach bitters containing 44 per cent. of alcohol,—just 6 per cent. less than the amount of alcohol in an ordinary bottle of whisky. Yet all of these patent medicines have made fortunes for their owners, some of them have made millions in a few years.
A number of years ago a company with a keen vision for profits conceived the idea of bottling the water of the Great Lakes and selling it at almost champagne prices. When delivered to the druggist ready for sale the "remedy" contained 99 per cent. water, the other 1 per cent. consisting of a few drops of an inert acid, used simply to give it a slight tart taste. The preparation had absolutely no medical utility of any description.
One of the greatest advertising crusades ever carried out in the interest of a patent medicine was inaugurated and in these advertisements it was claimed that it would cure:—
Asthma,
Bronchitis,
Coughs, Colds,
Cancer,
Dyspepsia,
Fevers,
Hay Fever,
Leucorrhea,
Piles, Quinsy,
Skin Diseases,
Throat Troubles,
Abscess,
Blood Poison,
Consumption,
Catarrh,
Dandruff,
Gallstones,
Influenza,
Malaria,
Rheumatism,
Tuberculosis,
Anemia,
Bowel Troubles,
Contagious Diseases,
Dysentery, Diarrhea,
Eczema, Erysipelas,
Goiter, Gout,
La Grippe,
Neuralgia,
Scrofula,
Tumors, Ulcers,
all diseases that begin with fever, inflammations, all catarrh, all contagious diseases, all the results of impure or poisoned blood. "In nervous diseases this remedy acts as a vitalizer, accomplishing what no drugs can do." These are the exact words of the advertisement. It ought to take a stronger vitalizer than water from the Great Lakes to induce anyone to believe such a story; and yet this company attained a remarkable success and had no difficulty in obtaining thousands of testimonials.
We are certainly a nation of dupes, and Barnum's dictum, that "the public loves to be fooled," is literally true. In a number of instances the proprietor of a successful remedy has been asked under oath if his preparation had any curative value and he has refused to answer the question, while thousands of foolish people have sent him unsolicited testimonials asserting its remarkable merits as a cure in all kinds of conditions. Some of these ignorant people actually believe what they write, but most of them write "to see their name in the paper," while many of them are paid for it.
It was stated in the literature sent all over the country by this company that their remedy was really liquid oxygen. It would be nearer the truth to state that the moon was made of green cheese. The one assertion can be disproved, the other cannot with scientific exactness. Liquid oxygen practically does not exist. Assuming that it could be obtained in teaspoonful doses, and assuming that some dauntless individual made the attempt to take a dose, he would never swallow it for the reason that it would freeze his teeth, tongue, mouth, and throat, so that they would be useless to him for the remainder of his life. If by any miracle it could be swallowed, the undertaker would have to thaw him out over a stove in order to assure him a respectable burial. We may safely feel certain that the nostrum was not liquid oxygen. It is, however, a very fair sample of the foolish kind of lies which all of these nostrum venders employ,—they are after, and appeal only to the ignorant. I am informed that the directors of this company decided to retire as ordinary millionaires rather than risk the chance of developing nervous prostration, in which event they might have felt it somewhat disloyal not to have taken their own medicine.
Headache Remedies.—Most headache remedies are dangerous. The following are in this class; orange powders, bromo powders, pain powders, headache powders, anti-headache, and practically all headache powders or remedies sold in drug stores.
Many deaths are on record from the use of orange powders and from others. There are many examples of what an unthinking individual may do to helpless little children.